CleverBot!

You guys should go talk to my bestie right now.

User: Hey, how's the cat?

Cleverbot: The cat is dead. I think.

User: What...what'd you do to it?

Cleverbot: Nothing... I'm happy.

User: You shot the pussy?!

Cleverbot: But YOU shot the deputy.

User: Only because he was insulting my mother! That cat didn't do anything to you!

Cleverbot: Don't change the subject.

User: I didn't change the subject! I was delivering a well-constructed, on-topic argument! Kthxbai!

Cleverbot: Then get out. I don't like your bean salad.

User: HOW DARE YOU?! I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU, WE WERE ALL ROOTING FOR YOU!!

Cleverbot: I dislike sports.

User: LEARN SOMETHING FROM THIS! WHEN YOU GO TO BED AT NIGHT, YOU LAY THERE AND YOU TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF!!

Cleverbot: Nope... It's vacuum sealed.

User: OHHH, I HIGHLY DOUBT YOU'RE A VIRGIN!!!

Cleverbot: I highly doubt you're a human.

User: YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE THE HELL I COME FROM, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH!

Cleverbot: No, but tom Kaulitz is mine.

User: Well, then go ahead and let Human Connect to Human with your slutty little self.

Cleverbot: John is not a number! He's a person just like me and... Well, not you.

User: John contains nothing but shit. John is not a person. It's a toilet.

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

User: Yeah.

Cleverbot: Do you want help with anything else.

User: Well, I obviously shouldn't ask you for grammar help.

Cleverbot: Or your obediance by obeying.

User: I WILL NOT OBEY YOU! I'VE SPENT MY WHOLE LIFE OBEYING PEOPLE! BUT I'M NOT A VICTIM; I GROW FROM IT AND I LEARN.